So recently my age was judged and has made me feel quite self conscious.Let me tell you the background. As some of you are aware I have a little girl who is nearly 8 months old and I don’t wear makeup, I don’t go out looking like i’m going to go to a club during the day and I certainly don’t look my age and I have known this for years. I have always been told that I look younger than my age and some of my mum friends recently questioned my age as well. It doesn’t normally bother me and I know when I hit 35 years old I will count it as a big blessing but the way I was judge last weekend has just made me feel really self conscious by the way I look and I am verging on the edge of thinking that I should be wearing makeup so that I am not judged any more.
There have been times where I have walked round the supermarket with India either in my arms or in her pram, I have occasionally noticed these looks from people as if they are thinking “teenage pregnancy” or “young parents” and judging me for having a baby so “young” even though I am not. I have brushed it off and told myself that maybe I am judging their looks and reading it all wrong. Sometimes when you speak to people about the looks people give you, they try and comfort you by telling you are reading them wrong and stop being so paranoid obviously they don’t say it as harsh as this but this is what they are basically saying.
So Dan and I at the weekend headed to a new house building company to go and look at some new homes, I was quite excited and was really looking forward to it. We had seen the company and their homes on the website and loved the design. We are not looking at moving officially but if the right house was to come on the market then we would probably go for it. I had a great feeling about these homes. They had everything we wanted and I was looking forward to have one sold to us. Now my family come from a selling background and I have a decent understanding of house to sell to someone so I am very aware of the “done” things to do.
We walked into the “office” (box) and the woman said “hello lovely” in such a way I felt like a 6 year old who had lost their way. I explained why we were there and we booked an appointment to see her a bit later on in the day as she was with someone. One thing I hate was that she called me lovely as if she knew me and if I was really young, any good sales person would not do that and also wouldn’t make someone feel like you are treating them like they are not worthy to buy a home. You must always sell to everyone you have no idea who they are and what money they have.
We went back for our appointment and she didn’t sell to us once, she didn’t even try to sell a home to us at all. The woman told us to go away and talk to their financial advisor and see what we can afford then come back and have a chat with them. Now I know and know with speaking to my dad about this you don’t do that, you sell them the lifestyle first and the home and then send them on their way, you don’t brush them off. Now I hear you, your thinking well how does this show she was judging your age…….. Just before we left she asked us how old we were, oh my goodness you don’t do that when you are in sales where is her professionalism? I replied “we are both 27” She couldn’t believe it she thought we were 21/22. There we go that says it all she was’t going to sell to us because we looked too young.
So following on from that it made me feel really self conscious and realise the people who see me walking around with my daughter are judging me for my age or what I look like at least and I was right. Maybe some of it is my anxiety but there are people out there who are looking at me and not getting my age right and to judge me on my age with a baby and think we are young parents is there worst judgement you can make.
Anyway for more reasons than listed above we will not be buying from that company there were too many risks involved with buying a new home from them and we weren’t prepared to take them, us as a family know a lot about the new house building industry for one reason and another that I won’t go into.
Anyway for clarification I am 27 years old as is Dan. So just because we look young doesn’t mean we are.
Thanks for reading sorry for the rant but just had to put it out there that not to judge people on their age or the fact that they look young with a baby.